Lust

They say I won't be able to handle this, 

I won't be able to accept you're gone,

I won't be able to detach.

I don't know how I might react when you leave.

For with us there are no promises or little whispers of love.

There are no gentle gazes or romantic dinners.

What there is, is a violent streak of passion.

A need to devour each other and be satisfied. 

When I am with you, when I lie next to you, exhausted yet satisfied,

I often wonder what this means? 

This relationship, what is it! 

I have no answer. I'm afraid to ask you, for I might lose you.

But when you nibble my lip or kiss my ear I feel so fulfilled.

Will I get attached? 

I don't know.

You refuse to talk.

You leave me with no other option but withdrawal owing to my proneness to be broken.

Direction

How must I tread these Pastures of life? 

If I were the wandering breeze,

Tamed only by my spirit,

If I were the rebellious stream,

Controlled only by my fancies,

How would I proceed?

Would I let trees and boulders curtail me once in a while? 

Or would I be careful around these?

Would I be impulsive or would I plan my journey? 

Would I ever slow down or change my course? 

The anticipation of the journey is more complex than the journey itself! 

But, then again, how would I tread these pastures of life? 

Musings on a Saturday Evening

I look out of my window at the setting sun and realise how things have changed.

I realise, my decisions are no longer carefree.

I realise, my actions are no longer impulsive. 

And suddenly from daddy's darling I've transformed into a young independent woman.

I no longer depend on mummy for food or laundry.

I decide when is the right time to come home.

When I work too late, no one peeps into my room asking me to sleep.

I realise, I'm suddenly eating more salad and fruits.

Going to the gym is a part of my daily routine. 

These new responsibilities, this new independence. 

They've definitely made all the difference.

A Little Unconventional

Sometimes seeing greater griefs of others doesn't make me less unhappy.

Sometimes I can be terribly mean.

This one weekend I decided to stay home.

The other day, I also had a bottle of wine by myself.

On the 13th I decided I have to walk out of this relationship because it's making me unhappy.

Today I was extraordinarily nice to my previous boyfriend.

Yesterday I didn't even acknowledge my neighbour at the supermarket.

Often I stare at the stars too long.

Being alone makes me melancholy.

I sneakily licked food off my fingers at a formal restuaraunt.

I'm a little weird, a little erratic.

I don't always have control over myself.

This makes me happy.

I shun this obsessive need to be perfect, to have certain emotions and behaviours.

I like a little unconventional.

Tinted Glasses

I I've always looked at everything through tinted glasses,

Some sights amazed me because of their grandeur,

Some disinterested me because they were so dull.

I liked my tinted glasses, they gave me an inexplicable power.

A power to see as I wanted.

One day, just out of curiosity I put my glasses down,

Amazed I was as my eye beheld an array of colours I never knew existed.

I was experiencing so much more than I had earlier.

I realised my attachment to my tinted glasses wasn't the best thing for me.

There were colours I would see and dislike, but now with a satisfaction of disliking them for their actual being.

Pre-held notions prevent us from seeing people as who they are.

How amazing would it be if we could let go of these notions just like the tinted glasses.

Each individual is a different colour, losing the tinted glass would help to appreciate and know so many more of our kind.

And just then the world would be such a colourful place.

The solitary light on a monstrous mountain

The solitary light on a monstrous mountain. 

How did it get the courage to alone conquer darkness with its weak beam?

What purpose was it serving?

How long has it been there?

How long shall it glow?

Who is it that this light benefits?

Perhaps I'll never know.

That weak beam, sent a strong message.

A message of determination and dedication.

To silently do what you must.

Like the Happy Wind!

I want to wander like the happy wind,

To scale great heights,

To bathing in sunshines,

To dancing on roaring waves,

To calmly sitting by shady trees,

I want to be the sunshine touching old churches,

I want to explore dark caves,

I want to penetrate the deepest corners of the universe! 

For while I wander, I find!

I find snippets of this soul that only knows to wander!